Ivan fading away

This is what self-sabotage is

Chances are good that the thought you are having right now – right NOW – is disempowering you and is moving you farther away from what you want.

And you have that kind of thought most of the time every single day.

That’s basically what self-sabotage is.

What kind of thoughts are these?

Any of the following:

  1. Thoughts about circumstances being the reason for your situation or for how you feel right now.

Ex: I lost my job, my business is not doing well, he/she left me, my kids don’t respect me, etc., and that’s why I’m miserable.

The truth: Circumstances aren’t the reason for your situation. What your brain is telling you about what happens IS!

  1. Thoughts, denying aspects of your history (not being at peace with your past)

Ex: I feel so much shame/regret/pain from what happened. I wish I could go back and change what happened.

The truth: You’ve never done anything wrong ever – in how you acted or reacted! You did the best you could with the resources and the awareness you had at the time!

  1. Thoughts about a “predicted” future, based on your past experience(s) and knowledge.

Ex: In my life, things happen very incrementally and with a lot of struggle. I’m not one of the people for whom things happen easily. [<- this was me by the way!]

The truth: Your mind is always going to serve you thoughts that are “supposed” to protect you by making sure that your future looks more like your past, or stated another way – that your future is familiar and there’s less chance of a surprise.

  1. Thoughts, based on resistance and forcing

Ex: I ‘have to’ finish this project today. OR I ‘need to’ put more time into my business/family, etc. OR I ‘must’ accept this situation. OR I ‘should’ be doing better.

The truth: If you ‘have to’ do something or be somebody what you are saying is that you don’t want to but you have to/need to, etc – basically you are resisting and fighting the change. That’s how it feels energetically in your body. The reality is you DON’T have to do (or be) anything. Unless you choose to.

  1. Thoughts, rooted in perceived inadequacy and limitation

Ex: I don’t deserve to find a partner who treats me with respect, dignity, and grace.

The truth: Whatever your form of “I’m not good enough” is that you believe about yourself – it’s a lie! It’s not who and what you are. It’s something you learned… and something you’ve practiced for decades!

That’s the bad news.

The good news is that you have the power to change all of this right now.

You don’t have to change your partner.

You don’t have to change your boss, your job, your career, or your business.

You don’t have to change your friends.

You don’t have to change your financial situation. (<- this may hit hard)

You don’t have to change how you look.

You don’t have to change yourself (not ever, but especially not from a place of “there’s something wrong with me”)

You don’t have to change any of your circumstances.

All you ‘may choose’ to do is change how you think, how you speak, and most importantly – how you RELATE to what happens. That’s it!