The 3 Biggest Lessons from the past 12 months with Nat

Yesterday Nat and I celebrated one year as a married couple. I sat down to reflect today…

Lesson #1

Have different rules for Her than for the rest of the world!

Applying the same rules we have for everyone doesn’t work well in our relationship with our soul partner. Pride, honor, boundaries – these work well outside of the home. But inside – they are the reason for two partners trying to survive each other rather than thriving with each other.

Lesson #2

Always focus on the content, not on the words!

My partner may feel threatened, scared, alone. At such times the words don’t matter. The content matters. The content holds the message (“I am scared and alone now”). In such moments, I can choose to not give power to the words that are said and to my own fear but rather to come back and remain in touch with my love for her. After all, she does the same when I feel scared and alone, and I say things that can hurt. This is the beautiful dance an intimate couple for life is invited to learn!

Lesson #3

To love my partner means to be able to deal with all of her!

Nobody is perfect. I am not. She isn’t either. She has the right to be angry just as much as she has the right to be joyful and happy. Do I want only the loving and joyful parts of her or am I ready to receive her fully in all of her forms – in all of her humanity?
It’s been a great year, my Love. Messy at times. But always full to the brim of learnings and growth!

There has been happiness, there has been sadness. And there has been a lot of joy and adventure – on the physical and on the emotional ‘soul’ level.

If we can remember to be in touch with our loving True Selves – we are good.

And, we can sometimes be scared too.

After all, we are just human.

I love you!

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