Life should be “my” way

By Ivan Nikolov

“Life (and people) should be this way.”

There’s a lot of resistance and suffering embedded in the essence of this statement.

“This is how it is – and it’s okay.”

There’s true freedom and inner peace in this statement.

Unfortunately, most people live their entire lives by the former… unconsciously, and not knowing that this is an illusion, that there is a whole new way of making meaning of what’s out there.

The real-life experience of someone living inside the “should have”, “could have” world of attachment to how things “should be” includes various levels of anxiety, confusion, frustration, apathy, and resignation.

From that space, very little is possible in the way of quality and depth of relationships, health, personal and professional expression, realized potential, in feeling good about oneself.

How do I know this?

I suffered in resistance for most of my life. I fought reality. I wanted reality to be different (or else I was unhappy).

I used to live my life that way. I no longer do.

In my life now, I practice acceptance of reality – because it’s the only reality I will always experience now. And, it’s always “NOW”. It will never be “then” or “someday”, or the future.

And, while I accept my reality, I still have my preferences for how I’d like it to be – with no attachment to whether it will be that way or not. If it happens to be that way – great. If it doesn’t – great. I don’t become diminished because of that. I acknowledge it and move on.

The reason I am writing about this today is because I know from speaking with hundreds of amazing individuals from all parts of the world who have brought all kinds of problems to the table – that just about everybody is living in their form of “should” future-based rigid world, resisting what is and suffering tremendously, instead of living in peace.

And, in my experience, it doesn’t matter how much money or success a person has or how accomplished they seem to the outside observer.

In my 47 years of studying how the mind works I’ve realized that it all comes down to 3 simple (but not necessarily easy) steps to moving past resistance and into acceptance and inner peace. These are:

  1. Accepting the world as it is
  2. Accepting yourself as you are
  3. Integrating all the pieces (the reasons for feeling inadequate and not good enough) into one whole, intimately connected to self and others being

The most interesting part is when a person moves from a place of constant resistance to acceptance and inner peace, life changes, and people seem to change seemingly without that person doing anything.

The reason for that is only one: the outer world (reality) is one thing only – the inner world made visible.

Please, read this again because it is important: The outer world is merely the inner world made visible.

This is the work that I do with my private clients in my 1-on-1 mentoring. And, the difference is felt not after years or many months. Oftentimes, it is felt immediately.

The typical liberated experience includes self-confidence, clarity of path and vision, inner peace – which result in vastly improved relationships with others (including intimate), improved health (mental, emotional, physical), newfound courage to give life to the unique personal gift that hasn’t yet been expressed.

If this seems like something you want to know more about, message me and I’ll be happy to share more if there is a fit (I’m not the best guide for everyone and not everyone is my true soul client – the person I can help the most).

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